Category: #MamaMindset (page 1 of 11)

Lesson 5: Create What YOU Believe In

♥ Part of the Series 35 Lessons at 35 Years of Life 

With a commitment for bite-sized + deliberate action today, tomorrow, and every day that I keep putting one foot in front of the other to create what I believe in.


I never imagined being the one to second-guess myself at the 99th hour, yet my worse-case-scenario became reality. We were just over a week away from my two scheduled workshops back in my hometown with only a handful of registered participants. In fact, I was ready to throw in the towel and postpone. So much so that I reached out to my collaborators and asked this, “Tough Q: Do you feel we should still proceed ahead?”

Even so, this is what I truly believed and shared with them, “I stand in this truth: At the end of the day, I know in my heart the right peeps will be in the room and feeling a bit uncertain…”

Even re-typing that I squirm at my resistance as I trail off with uncertainty. Nonetheless, I persisted. The learning in that lesson is for another post…wink, wink 😉 Today’s lesson is about making something out of nothing as the adage goes. Trusting while being lifted up that what you value matters. That there’s a space and place and the right folks ready to grow with you.

However, full transparency. The above was not clear until now, nearly two and half months later. Even as I write this I’m reminded of how far I’ve come in 3-5 years.

You know that favorite interview question: Where do you see yourself in 3 (to/or 5) years?

As I shared in 35 Lessons at 35 Years of Life:

When I turned 30 (in 2012) I launched my first biz—Jillybeads 4 Justice—to pursue my passion for jewelry-making and justice. It was the result of wanting to take a leap in owning the reality that I too, like the organizations I had been employed by, needed to diversify my income streams. To say it has been a journey would be an understatement, more like a roller coaster with all it’s twist and turns and moments of hanging by a thread.

With this perspective, I can more clearly see now that my professional path has been one of continued learning and self-discovery to embrace the intersections of my multi-passion spirit and zones of genius as a love leader, equity + inclusion consultant, and data goddess.

It’s at these intersections that I know I can and will bring my vision and mission wrapped into one to life for each of us to Love Yourself like a Mother! with Intentional Justice™ ♥

📸: @micaymj “Heartland Values” by Sue Kalicki at Nebraska Community Foundation


This is the heart and soul of Mama J. Love Consulting.

It’s with a commitment for bite-sized + deliberate action today, tomorrow, and every day that I keep putting one foot in front of the other to create what I believe in.

Will YOU Join Me?

Resetting for the Lovelution

This week’s post is coming from the road. A flashback to the bite-sized + deliberate daily action taken this week, so a couple days tardy due to all tech losing its charge and then no service. To that, I say,  “Hallelujah” instead of “I’m sorry” because the latter would be untrue. And so…

I’m taking a pause from a post each week going more in-depth of using my identity as a Black Queer Mamapreneur + Love Leader + Wife storytelling and meaning-making into each of the 35 Lessons at 35 Years of Life. All that’s to say, stay tuned for Lesson 4: The Water Calls Me in a little over a week on Tuesday, July 25th. Until then…

What’s on My Mind…

While many of these lessons are inspiring reflection and writing amidst the beauty of the central coast of Cali, it has been family time that has taken front and center. After an unexpected year of experiencing firsthand the unearthing our country’s underbelly, its more important than ever to find ways to reset for the continued lovelution.

What’s a lovelution?

Love is the revolution. A revolution of love. An evolution of love. Love that heals. Unplugging, playing, and losing track of time is what has been on my soul’s agenda. Yes, a privilege. One I don’t take lightly. Therefore, I soak it in a bit more knowing that I’m refueling with intention and love with Mama Ocean and dreaming about what’s to come this Fall.

Here we are jumping for JOY! 🌈 Photo Credit: Natalie Zern

And so, I invite you to contemplate with I…
What can you pause right now? 

What’s calling you? 

What makes you jump for joy?

How can you Love Yourself like a Mother! with Intentional Justice™ ?

⤵️ I’d love to know, so please share your comments below ⤵️

And, I’ll be back with a new post on Tuesday, July 25th 💋

In lovelution…

mama-j-sig-.jpg

Lesson 2: Love Makes a Family 🌈

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This is part of the series 35 Lessons at 35 Years of Life.

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First, first comes love. Then comes marriage.

Then comes the baby in the baby carriage.

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Anyone else sing this ditty as a girl? I most definitely did. However, what’s SO clear now is that my happily ever after would veer from what was hoped or expected for I.

Instead of a prince, I would find my non-dress-wearing, gender non-conforming princess to love. More of a delicate flower grounded with strong roots. My very own cherry blossom tree.

In fact, that’s where she proposed on a spring day in D.C. under our very own cherry blossom tree. Ironically (or serendipitously) to the West, where we’ve planted our roots, of the Washington Monument amidst the world-renowned Cherry Blossom Festival. 

Although Steph didn’t get down on one knee (thank goodness!), she thought it would be funny to do so after the fact 😉

I had an inkling all day. The woman who couldn’t sit still on the lookout for the perfect place to sit. Well, knell post rap. Yep, she proposed to her on beat solidifying she was my one.

Before our first marriage, the non-legal binding one in July 2011, I would question that love. Not hers of I. Instead the love for myself and how willing I would be up to the challenge to tackle and heal the darkness of my soul. Because with light, darkness is sure to fall. Mine just before “I do.” Or in our case…

I do…it because it’s the least I can do.

I do…it because I learned it from you.

I do…it because I want to.

This our final vow. A shoutout to our righteous babe love pulled from lyrics of Ani DiFranco’s Joyful Girl to conclude our personalized vows to one another. 

Joyfully United | July 3, 2011 Photo Credit: Cara Gardner

While I’ll save the details of the darkness for another day because, in the end, this was not my defining moment but instead my invitation to rise from the ash I had created. Resulting from the unintended consequences of the unhealthy and toxic love I had experienced as the observer of a dysfunctional marriage. All this to highlight…

Love saved me. Love change me. Love made my family possible.

The legality of our marriage (Thanks, SCOTUS just 4 years ago—June 26, 2013!) adding to our rights yet not our commitment. Because I never imagined it would be legal again.

With marriage equality obtained, opening the doors to our next chapter, the dream of the baby in the baby carriage. Aka, really an opportunity to learn all that had been skipped in sex ed when being taught about my body. Unfolding the secret that would lead to the 10-20 percent chance of conceiving.

So, when I chant the call: What makes a family?

And respond with, Love makes a family.

I know in every cell in my body that no truer words were spoken because love my dream possible…

Love for my Truth

Love for wanting more

Love for making changes

Love for believing in the love of another

Love for dreaming the impossible

Love for trusting the process

Love for my family.

No matter how your family is formed. Love is the driving force to building your tribe. Find your peeps and create your own lovelution!

This is my Tribe. My clan. My family.

🌈✨The Roth’s | Camping, Camping, Camping ⛺️

Our mixed-race two-mama Queer family made with love and intention 💕 #IntentionalJustice

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I’d love to hear in the comments, what makes your family unique?

In lovelution…

💋 mama j

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